When Prince William returned from his six week RAF assignment in the Falklands last week, he and Kate Middleton wasted no time packing their bags and jetting off to a luxury ski resort (1). On March 24th, The Mirror reported that, according to an unnamed source, William thoughtfully planned the “romantic” trip to Switzerland to surprise Kate and make up for being absent on Valentine’s Day (1). But two days later, a journalist for the Daily Mail dismissed the account as “ill-informed” and revealed that the royal couple were actually at “an equally chic resort” in France with Mike, Carole, and Pippa Middleton (2). Then, the following day, US Weekly reported that the Middletons funded the holiday because “William and Kate’s budget is quite small for trips.” -That too, was according to an unnamed source (3).
Numerous online publications continue to report each of these excuses for the Duke and Duchess’ holiday. The truth is, the location of William and Kate’s chalet is mostly irrelevant unless you’re a paparazzo. What is interesting though, is that each of these coexisting “news” reports – none of which has been retracted (to my knowledge) – paints the couple in a positive light – each in a different way, but each in a specific way the pair needs to improve their public image. It’s as though all bases have been covered. The Switzerland tale implies that William is a doting and attentive husband eager to demonstrate his love to his wife, who he places on a pedestal. The report that the pair are in France on a Middleton Family-funded holiday implies that the Duke and Duchess are frugal, and are only tearing themselves away from their royal duties to accept a gift and spend time with their valued middle class family members. Regardless of which is (closest to being) true, the public has received both stories, and every last direct and indirect implication of each.
Switzerland and William’s [Fictional?] Romantic Surprise
The Unwritten Implications: The trip is desperately needed romantic relief from the royal couple’s emotionally traumatic six week separation. -And evidence of a passionate reunion. Who cares that they’re on a luxury trip again? -Poor Kate missed her prince so terribly, and this is such a sweet way for William to redeem himself to his princess for missing Valentine’s Day! William’s efforts were a demonstration of how deeply he is in love with Kate – and how amazingly well he treats and spoils her. (Aww, what a dream husband! Who wouldn’t love to be the luckiest girl in the world [Kate] right now?!). Also, the the Royal Family has tremendously improved how it handles new royal consorts since Diana’s days. This marriage is going to be a success, and it couldn’t be further from the web of indifference, adultery, and secret suffering woven by Prince Charles and Princess Diana. -Nothing like the stories of what Charles did to his virginal teenage bride – neglecting and criticizing her into bulimia and cruelly committing himself to tamponhood at every opportunity for that haggard old harlot, Camilla. Yes, those horrid days are over, and William and Kate’s fairytale love story is the perfect remedy for recovery.
Without the rose-colored blind fold: First of all, what makes anyone think that treating his wife well is William’s primary motivation behind the excessive vacationing instead of the desire to go on fun-filled trips or avoid work and royal duties? Prince William has yet to demonstrate he’s as much of a nightmare husband as Prince Charles seemed to be in the 90s, but honestly, he’s a hard sell as a “Prince Charming.” It’s not forgotten that he strung Kate along for four or five years, dumped her (via text message, supposedly), and upon taking her back, strung her along for four additional years before putting a ring on her finger (-A ring from a failed and disturbingly miserable marriage, no less!). Out of pure logic, it is extremely difficult to believe that William is deeply in love – or in love at all – with the woman he was so painfully reluctant to marry.
Even worse is that Kate spent nearly a decade appearing to live a meaningless existence, presumably so she could be at William’s beck and call as she waited for a marriage proposal. This may reveal Kate as a lazy and desperate social climber, but it also suggests that she and William have never been equals in their relationship. From what the world has seen, it has always been absolutely unmistakable that he is dominant and she is submissive – and possibly to an unhealthy extreme. Regardless of her faults, she has always appeared to take a backseat and accommodate his lifestyle and choices without any (publicly visible) reciprocation from him. And even though she was a willing and highly rewarded participant, the point is, a doormat is obviously this Prince Charming’s preferred type of woman. The pair seem to be highly comfortable with one another and to enjoy each other’s company. But they give the impression that they are less in love, and more like great friends who made a great deal: William’s wealth, fame and status in exchange for Kate’s daily doormat services. Also, Kate being thirty and not pregnant after a year of marriage doesn’t help dispel the notion that their relationship is minimally sexual.
They may have a lot in common, but they also seem to be on completely different pages when it comes to their goals concerning major life steps. Speculatively, if it were solely up to Kate, she would have married William six or seven years ago, and would already be the proud mother of a cute little pair of heirs. The common perception that William calls the shots in their relationship suggests that, when the couple reportedly decided to wait to become engaged, marry, or start a family, it was his will – regardless of what she may have wanted. Does it seem at all realistic that Kate needed about nine years of dating to decide she wanted to marry William, and/or that she felt it was important to wait (and wait, and wait, and wait, and wait…) for the “timing” to be right – that she wanted to reach a certain point in some Jigsaw or Party Pieces “work” goals before marrying him? (William stressed the “timing-due-to-work” bit in the [intelligence-insulting] engagement interview). It seems obvious that the couple’s relationship is (and has been) almost completely tailored to suit William – and that if Kate wanted a shot at a royal position, she needed to prove her doormat durability. These ideas are speculation, but the press reports and facts of their past and present situations bring to question whether anything they do is dictated by Kate, and whether William is actually somewhat of a narcissistic tyrant.
Aside from her high hemlines and signature brand of mediocrity, Kate actually didn’t commit any major offenses while William was in the Falklands. She even made a teensy-weensy bit of progress toward being an independent, barely working Royal! But as soon as William returned, her light almost-work routine came to a screeching halt in favor of a leisurely trip (when they’d already taken one to Mustique just before William left for the Falklands!!!). And reportedly, now that he’s back, Kate will not engage in any public engagements for several months (WHY?! *facepalm*) (4). Does William realize that the public has been starting to turn on his work-shy wife? -And that play before work will only ruin her image further and destroy whatever she gained during his absence? Does he even care about her image? Or his own, for that matter?
Concerning the Royal Family’s treatment of new consorts, it seems they have made improvements since Diana’s time. Clearly, they have lowered their duty and conduct expectations for Kate *clears throat*. Actually, aside from her grotesque skeletal appearance, the seemingly simple-minded Duchess appears to be far less than miserable playing dress up, greeting people, and posing for pictures (and… whatever else she does…?).
The identity of the Switzerland story’s source was not revealed, but he or she obviously had some motivation to transmit the story, which portrayed William, Kate, and the other royals very favorably. It now appears the story was false, unless the couple did spend a short time at the Swiss resort before meeting the Middletons in France. If the source was transmitting whatever the Palace or William and Kate’s PR Team’s agenda is, these parties ought to realize that they should focus their efforts elsewhere. Of course the public would strongly disapprove if Kate were being treated cruelly or with indifference by William and the other royals – a mirror of Diana’s situation. But how Kate is being treated – which appears to be more than adequate without interference by stories like this – is not of primary concern to the people right now. They don’t need to be reassured that Work-Shy-Waity is being wined and dined and treated to anything and everything her undeserving heart could desire. They need to be shown that this overindulged woman-child is committed to taking on a full time schedule of royal duties and charity work, to becoming a mother soon, and to becoming an impressive role model – not just to girls, but to women – and not just because of her clothes or security blanket hair.
Additionally, the people need to be assured that William is going to stop acting like a spoiled teenager with maximum privileges and minimal responsibilities. This holiday is a perfect example of his immaturity and lack of commitment. He’s supposed to be setting an example for crying out loud. Do the senior royals act this way, and are the other RAF service members who accompanied William in the Falklands – who earn far less from tax payer funds, no doubt – entitled to a post-assignment luxury trip because of a measly six weeks of work since their last holiday? William’s royal engagement schedule is inexcusably sparse for a man of nearly 30 who stands second in line for the thrown. For years, he has primarily attended events pertaining to his personal sporting interests. Now that Kate is by his side, he has shown a strong preference for adding glamorous dinners and celebrity-style events to his royal activities over less pleasant yet more meaningful potential duties. Over the years, and especially after recently confessing he isn’t ready to be a full-time royal, he has painted himself as uncommitted to his role. Is William willing to be a full-time anything regarding work or duty, and could he be using his RAF helicopter pilot job as an excuse to avoid the responsibilities that (should) accompany his royal privileges?
At this point in time, the public needs to be able to relate to the new royal couple – to feel that William and Kate share their values and are in touch with their concerns and daily hardships. At the same time, they need to see two people who they can look up to as role models – a future King and Queen who inspire them. In reality, William and Kate are not even close to fulfilling those needs. But that doesn’t prove their public relations team isn’t aware and willing to help. The source of the Middleton-funded France trip story is unknown as well, but like the source of the Switzerland tale (Maybe the same person?), he or she delivered a story that paints the couple in a conveniently perfect positive light.
France: A Ski Trip Fit for a [Future] Queen – Compliments of Mr. and Mamma Middleton
The unwritten implications: William and Kate are so frugal (because they’re heavily in touch with and sympathetic to the economy’s impact on their people of course). Haven’t you heard? They’re just like us! They wouldn’t spend their own money supply on something indulgent like a chalet in the French Alps (as if they could afford to!). They are unimaginably far above the rest of us, but it is in their humble nature to value any time they can spend being a low-key, “normal” married couple (Some of us envy them, but with all the heavy sacrifices they make as royals, they envy us too!). Luckily, they have Kate’s adoring, generous, and filthy rich parents to treat them to a wholesome dose of quality middle class family time every now and then! (And by the way, what a business mastermind the Amazing Carole must be to have made so many millions from that little party hat-peddling store she operates out of a barn! -Watch out Bill Gates! William may come from royalty, but Kate comes from an equally impressive flock of wholesome super-humans.). It’s perfectly acceptable that William and Kate are on a luxury trip again because they haven’t paid for it themselves and, well, poor, unfortunate William truly relies on what little time he gets with the Middletons – a whole, functional and “normal” family. He may be a future king with the world at his disposal, but deep down, he’s a victimized little boy who will never fully recover from his overexposed and distressing childhood – a consequence of the tremendously difficult life he’s been forced to lead.
Without the rose-colored blindfold: Mike and Carole Middleton may have paid for William and Kate’s trip, but the idea of that is incredibly rough to swallow. It is not specified how much of the trip has been funded by the Middletons, so it is possible that the “treat” to the royal couple could have been a lunch sandwich for William and a crouton and water for Kate – for all anyone knows. However, the wording in the report does imply that the family has provided everything, which is about as easy to imagine as a homeless man passing out gourmet meals to drivers who pass him on the street. -It is completely backwards from logical assumption, and in this case, seems too convenient to be true. Based on the financial status of the royals versus the maximum status fathomable for the Middletons (Party Pieces is an online mom n’ pop shop, not a massive global corporation), it’s second nature to think that William and Kate funded their own holiday, and treated the Middletons to the trip – not the other way around.
The report suggests that the Middletons must have funded the trip, because the Duke and Duchess couldn’t have done so on their own (3). How much William and Kate are allotted by the commonwealth for leisure trips is unknown (to me), but the Royal Family has substantial investments from which they derive a great deal of wealth. The thought that they would need to rely on their middle class family’s funds for a trip instead of their own seems completely ridiculous. It is possible that the Middletons paid for the trip, but hysterically improbable that they had to for the couple to briefly escape from Britain.
Whether or not Mike and Carole paid for the trip, the fact that a source came forward to explain the funding situation only helps confirm the inadequacy of the future Prince and Princess of Wales. (It’s no different than than the Palace releasing an official statement to deny that Kate wears hair extensions *still can’t believe they lowered themselves to that*). Clearly, if the pair were living up to people’s expectations and had demonstrably worked hard enough to truly deserve a vacation, then no explanation of how the holiday was funded would be necessary. Honestly! If the public felt that William and Kate were pulling their weight and satisfactorily earning their lavish lifestyle by giving back, there would be very little care about who or what funded an occasional leisure trip. Unfortunately, they aren’t even “part-time” workers (by public standards), are barely putting in minimally acceptable efforts toward royal duties and charity work, and their holidays have been far too frequent. As the unnamed source confirmed, the source of funding for this trip is relevant – because to taxpayers, the underachieving Duke and Duchess have no business being on holiday right now.
Richard Kay for the Daily Mail raised an excellent topic of discussion:
…the question remains as to why Prince William should be so keen to holiday with his in-laws, after so long away from his wife whom he married just under a year ago.” (2)
My, my, that is an excellent implied point. -A point that falls well in line with William being anything but a Prince Charming who is deeply in love with his wife and incredibly thoughtful toward her. It also supports the notion that William and Kate’s marriage is an opportunistic deal between friends – friends without many [sexual] benefits. What kind of madly in love couple wants to be joined by their parents/in-laws within a day or two of being reunited after six weeks of separation? Does William even value his potentially-romantic alone time with Kate, or is time with her non-royal family more appealing? It’s one thing to get along well with in-laws, and another entirely that William seems to have forfeited quality time with Kate in order to spend it in an unintimate group environment with her family. He seems about as in love as he did throughout the pair’s nine year premarital relationship! He’s – so eager - to have that Kate, I tell you! *sarcasm* Who ever said a relationship can’t be a one way street?
It is downright laughable to think of William as a victim of the public and boy-at-heart who relies on his luxury holidays with the Middletons because, from a past of deprivation, he has only ever wanted a “normal” family to spend time with. Yes – he was pursued and photographed relentlessly as an infant, child, and teenager; Yes – he very unfortunately lost his mother as an adolescent; Yes – he is obligated to serve his country, and to one day fill a king’s shoes (which many would view as a privilege). But if William wants to be “normal” so badly, he should try living off of the average income in the UK. -Or even off of the salary he makes from however many days he actually works at his RAF pilot position. How many of the other RAF service members are privileged to staying on large, private, off-base estates while they serve? How many travel out of the country for leisure both before and after short-term postings? How many in the UK can choose to significantly limit the number of days they work per year, because their income is negligible to them? How many don’t have to worry about bills or trying to advance in a career or education? How many, after earning only a bachelor’s degree and achieving very little career advancement, are bowed down to around the world and shown preference and unwarranted respect at every turn? How many can consider attending lavish dinners and fun-filled sporting events as work? And how many are not even mostly responsible for themselves at his age? -Not responsible for a family, a business, a career, or full financial support for one’s self? Somehow, I think Prince William would run home to his palace, crying like a baby while sucking his thumb, if he ever had to rough it as a “normal” man. He, like anyone, should be careful of what he wishes for.
*The “unwritten implications” are the author’s perceptions and are based on many influences – not solely on information from the sources cited.
Sources
(1) Moodie, Chlemmie. “Prince William whisks Kate away for romantic skiing break.” Mirror. 3/24/2012.
(2) Kay, Richard. “William and Kate holiday with the in-laws: Couple hit ski resort with Duchess’ parents.” Daily Mail. 3/26/2012.
(3) Johnson, Zach. “Prince William, Kate Middleton Embark on Family Skiing Trip in France!” US Weekly. 3/27/2012.
(4) Dray, Kayleigh. “Goodbye for now, Kate Middleton!” Entertainmentwise. 4/1/2012.